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10 Most Frequently Asked Online Dating Questions


I want to meet a date online, but I can’t decide if I should use a paid or free online personals site. What do you recommend?

There’s a proven difference between paid and free dating websites. Studies have shown that men and women are more likely to invest a larger amount of time getting to know their date if they have paid for the site they’re using. Since they have invested money in the service, they’re willing to put more time in the process of finding the right person. If you’re looking for a serious, long-term relationship, paid dating sites are your best bet.

If you’re simply looking for a casual fling or for online friendship, free dating sites will be your best option. People on free dating sites are often looking for something less serious, which will give you plenty of options in what you’re looking for.

How honest should I be in my online personals profile?

This is all personal opinion. Coming from someone who has used online dating to its fullest extent, my suggestion would be to be entirely honest in your profile. That’s not to say you should divulge every little detail about yourself, but if your end goal is to start a relationship with these people, they’re eventually going to realize that you’ve lied, which will create a very shaky foundation for you to build anything upon.

What is the best type of profile picture to attract a good match?

Always have your picture true to life. If you’re a little overweight, there are people who look for that! In trying to mask what you consider flaws, you may be hiding the biggest asset that someone is looking for.
Try to have a nice clear shot of your face so people can see what you look like. Don’t use group shots, as people may be mislead about who you are.

If you have a strong interest that leads your life (i.e.- if you’re a chef, and you’re passionate about your job), there’s no harm in including that in your picture! It lets people know that you have interests, and may even help you attract people that have similar interests as you.

most important thing is to try and let your personality show your picture. It’s the first impression people are going to get of you, and you should try to give them the clearest impression of yourself as you can. You wouldn’t want to show up to a date to see someone completely different than the pictures you’ve been talking to, so you should be sure to help others avoid the same problem.

I’ve never been on a date with someone I met online. Should I invite them to my house, since it’s where I’m most comfortable, or should I go to their house, since it’s where they’re most comfortable?

Neither! If you’re meeting someone for the first time, you always want to think safety first. Even though you’ve spoken with and gotten to know them online, you really don’t know what surprises may be in store when you meet them. If it’s your first time meeting an individual, always try to do it in a public, mutual location. Anything too close to your house or too secluded can be dangerous, so try to pick a place like a public park or a well-traveled restaurant to meet.

I’ve been chatting with the same person I met through a personals search for about six months now, and she wants to add me to Facebook. Do you think this is a good idea?

You need to assess how much information they will have access to through your Facebook account. A lot of people limit the amount of personal information the post about themselves on Facebook to begin with, and if that’s the case with you, then it wouldn’t hurt to make your online relationship a little more personal with them by allowing them to be your virtual friend.

If you have personal photo albums, your address, and other information you have yet to share with them, you may want to keep them on a limited profile or off all together to insure there’s no invasion of privacy.

I recently got divorced. Is there anyone in the online dating community looking to date a divorcee, or should I not bother?

A big portion of online daters are divorcees. Online personals are truly your best way to get back into the dating game after being out for so long. It’s a comfortable place to ease back into the romantic world, while avoiding the pressure of having to strike up a conversation with a stranger. It avoids any fear of face-to-face rejection and truly lets you take things are your own pace.

What kinds of questions should I ask an online date to get to know them better?

An online date is just like a date in the real world. Get to know their daily interests to get a better feel of how compatible your lives are. What do they do for a living? Do they have hobbies? Certain foods they like? Do they travel? If so, where to? Do they have children? Want children? Anything you’re curious about, as long as it doesn’t cross the line into too personal, is what you should ask. You won’t get answers to questions you don’t ask, so ask away!

How do I know what dating site is right for me?

You have to put some research into finding the online personals site that’s best going to work for you. First, assess what it is you’re looking for. A casual fling? A long-term relationship? Something online only? All preferences have online dating websites that are targeted towards their specific needs. Signing up for a website that is targeted towards sexual encounters when you’re looking for a serious relationship will get you nothing but time wasted.

A lot of dating websites will have free user trials, so once you’ve found one you think would be a good fit, test it out and see if you like how the site works, and if you find the other users suitable candidates for what you’re looking for.

Is online dating safe?

Online dating is as safe as you make it. As long as you don’t divulge too much personal information and stay cautious regarding whom you’re speaking with, you’ll be safe. You have to remember that regardless of how long you’ve been chatting with someone online for, you don’t know the real person until you meet them face to face. Keep that in mind while chatting and never reveal too much about yourself.

Can I be a member of more than one online dating site?

You can be, but you shouldn’t be. By using more than one site, you’re not letting yourself give your full attention to one place. You should find a site that works best for you and spend time trying to get to know members who are of interest to you. If you find that the site isn’t for you, then there’s no need to waste extra time on it. Find one that does work and put all of your attention into that.

By using multiple dating sites, you’re hindering yourself. Instead of optimizing the site you use, you’re distracted with keeping track of how much time you’ve spent on which site and who you’ve spoken to where. By choosing one site, you’re allowing yourself to find its full potential.

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